Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Filming a Ghost: Jandek in Chapel Hill

Last night, there was a ghost sighting in Chapel Hill, a sighting I was fortunately able to document on videotape. The ghost was dressed in a black suit and pants, with a black hat and a black electric guitar. He was accompanied by three other specters, who employed a wide variety of instruments, including keyboards, drums, bass, xylophone, saxophone, and howling. Together, their ghostly reverie haunted the sacred walls of UNC’s Gerrard Hall, a place that I was told James K. Polk had once spoken at, from 7:30 to 9:30 on a cold Sunday evening. The ghost in charge of the proceedings went by many names: Sterling Smith, the representative from Corwood, or the name most people know him by, Jandek.

An elusive individual, yet one who had been releasing records with astounding profuseness since 1978, Jandek only started giving live concerts in 2004, when a music festival in Glasgow wrote to his PO box in Houston (the only way to get in touch with him) asking him to come and perform. Shocking all parties involved, Jandek agreed, and has continued with an on-and-off tour schedule since, rarely playing the same venue twice, and always with a different backing band. For this performance, Jandek was accompanied by John Darnielle of The Mountain Goats on keyboards, an instrument he admitted to having never played live since he was 9; Anne Gomez on bass, sax and the aforementioned howling; and drummer Brian Jones, who also took time to bang away on a xylophone during some of the numbers. Before the show, some of the ushers had set up a table where you could pick up pairs of earplugs, giving an indicator as to what was in store for the audience.

The set lasted two hours, and incorporated roughly six songs, most of which stretched past the twenty-minute mark. The opening number began with about 15 minutes of instrumental noise courtesy of Darnielle banging away on the keyboards, Gomez slapping her bass, and Jones rapidly swapping out time signatures, before Jandek took to the microphone with a long list of items, each one beginning with the phrase “I tried…” One of the shorter numbers was a song entitled “I Think I’m Unstable”. I assume that was the title since that line was repeated ad infinitum during the eight-minute song, in between harmonica solos (also performed by Jandek) and Darnielle complementing the harmonica with organ. The most memorable song of the night was a sort of call-and-response between Jandek and Gomez, in which Jandek would recite a few lines from his lyric book and Gomez would respond with a sustained howl into her microphone. The first time she did this, it elicited some whoops and shouts from the audience. Subsequent times, it simply became another instrument in the swirling mass of the song.

Overall, it was a fascinating concert to watch, even though I had to watch most of it through a viewfinder. There were three cameramen total: me, positioned stage left, roughly six rows back; and my friends Justin and Daniel, who were both in the balcony, center stage and stage right, respectively. We were told that a live album/DVD would be forthcoming (if the pattern of live Jandek titles continues, this one will surely be called Chapel Hill Sunday), but that it might be a while because Jandek was still working on releasing albums of concerts from a couple years ago. As I handed the tapes off to the mysterious representative from Corwood, I made sure to tell him that I couldn’t wait to see the finished result.

The flyers were printed on manila envelopes, complete with a pair of one-cent stamps.

Thanks to Justin and Daniel for filming, Neil for moral support, and especially Ned for making it all happen.

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Jane Austen vs. Predator

So...just last week, I talked about the upcoming zombie spoof of Jane Austen's seminal work, Pride and Prejudice, entitled Pride and Prejudice and Zombies. Now, I receive the following e-mail:

Elton John’s Rocket Pictures hopes to make the first Jane Austen adaptation to which men will drag their girlfriends. Will Clark is set to direct "Pride and Predator,” which veers from the traditional period costume drama when an alien crash lands and begins to butcher the mannered protags, who suddenly have more than marriage and inheritance to worry about.
Wow. Did all of Jane Austen's books suddenly become public domain so everyone's jumping on the parody bandwagon or is there a niche market for sci-fi twists on classic novels that I am unaware of? 'Cause I'll go ahead and admit I always thought an alien invasion would've been a nice addition to The Count of Monte Cristo, and why not have Jean Valjean on the run not only from the French police, but also from a killer cyborg from the future? Hollywood, I am waiting for your call.

Happy Birthday to Me!

And what greater gift to get than the greatest viral video ever?

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

The Lonely Island, Incredibad

The success of Internet comedy trio The Lonely Island could’ve easily been attributed to being in the right place at the right time, but their staying power has proved that Lorne Michaels didn’t just pick the first result that came up on YouTube. Now, the three Saturday Night Live cast members/writers have returned to their original moniker for Incredibad, a CD/DVD compiling their most memorable songs from SNL, as well as a handful of new tracks and sketches.

The first thing you may notice about the collection of tracks is that Andy Samberg, Jorma Taccone, and Akiva Schaffer have an affinity for nerdcore rap, whether its Andy and fellow SNLer Chris Parnell bustin’ rhymes about a trip to the theater to see The Cronicles of Narnia (“Lazy Sunday”), or Andy and Akiva bragging about their nautical escapades with T-Pain (“I’m On a Boat”). While this is a strategy that pays off pretty consistently, it does make for a somewhat tedious listen once we finally arrive at the alien three-way that is the title track. High-profile guests like Jack Black and Norah Jones provide entertaining diversions from the familiar material, and it’s nice to finally have unbleeped versions of SNL favorites like “Dick in a Box” and “Natalie’s Rap,” a hilarious hardcore rap parody featuring a wonderfully unhinged Natalie Portman.

Interludes like “The Old Saloon” poke fun at the obnoxious DJ call-outs during promo tracks, but sometimes, like in the case of “Shrooms,” the simpler the idea, the funnier. Songs rarely break the three-minute mark, which is the perfect length to get the jokes across without wearing out the concept, something the other writers of SNL could stand to learn.

Overall, Incredibad does an exceptional job cataloging the first few years of one of the more recent success stories to emerge from the Not Ready for Primetime Players. However, the accompanying DVD feels more like a last-minute bonus than a comprehensive collection, only delivering five of their infamous “SNL Digital Shorts” and three Lonely Island skits. Still, a gift horse this hilarious shouldn’t be looked in the mouth, especially if said horse has just consumed a bottle of Carlos Santana’s champagne.

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Your Week in Zombie News

For some reason, there appears to be a steady amount of zombie-related media being released to the unsuspecting public, and while I am all for anything and everything zombie, I feel the need to point out two of the more recent releases:

Pride and Prejudice and Zombies
by Jane Austen and Seth Grahame-Smith

Featured on NPR's "Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me," and recommended by John Hodgman, one of the stars of the #1 Children's Film in America, this parody of the classic Jane Austen novel features the original text, plus "all-new scenes of bone crunching zombie action!" The book's already reached #88 on the Amazon.com Best-Seller list, and it hasn't even been released yet! Also, that cover is amazing. Zombifying the covers of famous literature needs to be the new Photoshop challenge.Pride and Prejudice and Zombies is just ten bucks from Amazon.com. It's release date is listed as "unknown."

Otto; or, Up with Dead People
a film by Bruce LaBruce

This film and I crossed paths last year when I was a programmer for the Cucalorus Film Festival, and let me tell you, I hope we never see each other again. I am all for more gay/lesbian cinema. In fact, a lot of the entries I viewed were about homosexual relationships, and for the most part, they were all very entertaining and would've been perfect fits for Cucalorus. Bruce LaBruce's gay zombie porn, however, was boring, incomprehensible, and featured embarrassingly bad acting by people who clearly had no need to attempt the fake foreign accents they were trying to pull off. I mean, seriously, how do you fuck up a film taking place in a parallel universe where "gay zombie porn" has become a cottage industry? It practically writes itself! And look at the tagline on the DVD cover:That's right; it says "Bringing sexy back...from the dead." If half the film were as creative as that tagline, maybe Otto would've been shown at the festival. It's still ten times better than the offensively heterosexual Deadgirl, recent Cucalorus entry and my pick for worst film of '08. Otto; or Up with Dead People is on DVD for $24.99 on Amazon.com.

Thursday, February 05, 2009

Countdown to Watchmen: The Keene Act and You

The Watchmen viral videos continue with this fake PSA on the Keene Act, which banned the act of costumed vigilantism in the United States:



Not as professional as the vintage 1970 newscast, but I love the step-by-step "How to Avoid Rorschach" at the end. For more awesomeness, check out the official website for The New Frontiersmen, as well as their Flickr page.

Pictures for Sad Pilgrim

I love when two of my favorite comic artists collaborate on one strip. In this case, John Campbell (Pictures for Sad Children) provides the story while Bryan Lee O'Malley (Scott Pilgrim) provides the pictures:

Wednesday, February 04, 2009

Twittering Sátántangó

Bela Tarr is often heralded as the master of the long take. His films are known for their slow, drawn-out stories and the elaborate camerawork that accompanies them. I've known of several films by this Hungarian auteur (Werckmeister Harmonies, The Man from London) but after reading this analysis on NotComing.com, I decided to make Sátántangó, a seven-plus-hour epic that spans four discs, my first foray into Tarrville.



Now, even though I decided to go on this journey alone, it doesn't mean I can't share in the experience. So I've chosen to post my thoughts on Twitter as I watch the film. After I've finished with each section of the film, I'll post all my twitters in this blog post for easy reference. So, without further ado, let the twittering (tweeting, twiting, whatever) begin!

Part 1: February 5

9:08 PM - Part one of seven-hour Bela Tarr movie tonight. See you on the other side.

9:13 PM - Let's see if I can make it back to my apartment without freezing to death first.

10:24 PM - 47 minutes in and I'm already getting tired. (For some reason, this post never made it from my phone to Twitter, so I'm paraphrasing.)

10:44 PM - At 1:07, a bug crawls around on the camera lens. Nice touch.

10:46 PM - This score sounds like it was performed on an old Casio.

10:59 PM - Is Futaki a Hungarian name?

11:09 PM - Now watching an old man fall asleep. Was this movie designed to treat insomnia?

11:18 PM - Most exciting thing to happen in the film so far: the old man fell over.

11:26 PM - When I hear the title of this film, I can't help but think of the Clap Your Hands Say Yeah song, "Satan Said Dance."

11:50 PM - End of part one. Wow. 2:10 in, and we don't even have anything resembling a plot! We'll see what happens in part two, once Netflix sends it.

Part 2: February 8 (My phone decided to go apeshit on me, so tweets appeared out of order or not at all. Hooray for technology!)

9:27 PM - Alright, you asked for it (actually, you didn't). It's time for part two of Sátántangó!

9:33 PM -
Ok, let's see if i can remember all the characters from part one...

9:43 PM - Every conversation in this film seems to take place in two different time zones.

9:43 PM - Ah, that creepy electronic score is back!

9:56 PM - I believe that was the shortest chapter yet, 25 minutes.

10:02 PM - Ah, I believe we have reached the infamous "cat torture" chapter of the film.

10:06 PM - Starting to get tired earlier than I was last week. 35 min. vs. 54 min.

10:16 PM - I think I would much rather be Kelly Reichardt's dog than Bela Tarr's cat.

10:23 PM - I don't think Irimias is ever gonna arrive in town.

10:26 PM - PETA would have a field day with this film, but they're too busy dealing with "Kittens on a Roomba."

10:35
PM - Gotta break to pick up my roommate.

11:04 PM - Aaaand...back to the cat torture.

11:11 PM - I think Bela's taken the "film the actor as they walk away" motif as far as it can go.

11:12 PM - Have now acquired alcohol and will drink every time the camera cuts.

11:17 PM - Dr. Drink-A-Lot makes a return appearance.

11:25 PM - Little girl chapter over. Now on to a chapter subtitled "The Devil's Nipples."

11:29 PM - If that guy says the word plodding one more time...

11:34 PM - Everyone in this movie looks as if they're missing a soul.

11:46 PM - Man, even the parties in this film are depressing to watch.

11:48 PM - Could someone explain the man with a loaf of bread attached to his head?

11:52 PM - This is the worst song ever.

11:53 PM - I think I would rather hear the drunk man talk about plodding for an hour than listen to any more of this song.

12:00 AM - This is the second time someone has fallen asleep in the movie. A hint of sorts?

12:08 AM - And end of part 2.


UPDATE: So...some of you may be wondering why I never concluded this entry with my analysis of the third part of Sátántangó. The fact of the matter is that I thought this was a pretty silly exercise to begin with, and I didn't feel the need to continue it with the third disc. Rather, I just sat down and watched the film, unabated and undeterred. And even though the above posts may lead some to believe that I held the film in contempt and desired to mock it before it even began, the truth is that I thought Bela Tarr's film was a fascinating experiment in subtlety and mood, from the foreboding opening shot of cattle prowling the streets of an empty village, to the never-ending trek the old doctor takes to find the source of the mystery bells. Overall, it was a satisfying experience, although it's an experience I probably won't choose to repeat for some time, at least until I have another seven hours to kill.

Also, I have no idea what's going on in the comments to this post. Either someone is posting the same time as different people (I highly doubt that Mihaly Vig actually reads my blog) or it's computer hour over at the looney bin. (My apologies to people who actually posted coherent responses.)

Gatorade Corners the Elusive Nerd Market

Gatorade sells a lot of sports drinks to a lot of people, but apparently they must have been missing out on the demographic of geeks and nerds (a demographic that yours truly is a lifetime member of). How else to explain this insanely elaborate homage to Monty Python and the Holy Grail, entitled The Quest for G?


While the joke doesn't really work some of the time (how do you make fun of something that was funny to begin with?) there are some inspired moments, including the gang's showdown with dance group JabbaWockeez and their final battle with a fire-breathing poodle.

Friday, January 23, 2009

The Viral Marketing of Watchmen Begins

...with this exceptionally well-made fake newscast from 1970, commemorating the tenth anniversary of Dr. Manhattan. Check it out, especially if you've never read the book, as it will (hopefully) answer some of your more pressing questions about the film.



Watchmen arrives, court-approved, in theaters March 6.

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

RE: OMG TWTR

Let me explain the addition of a new sidebar that you may (or probably may not) have noticed. Because my public demanded it (they didn't) and because I have such a fascinating life (I don't), I decided to sign up for Twitter, the all-purpose digital personal space invader that's like Facebook, except minus everything but the status updates. Anyhoo, mildly interesting and possibly embarrassing (depending on my intoxication levels) updates will be collected in the new DiMattiaTwitter Incessant Ramblings sidebar. Apparently a lot of famous people do it (including the aforementioned LeVar Burton), so that's usually enough to convince me to tag along (and before you ask, yes, I would jump off a cliff if LeVar Burton did it, too, but don't take my word for it. BA-DAH-DUMM!)

Other famous (and semi-famous) people twittering (or tweeting, or whatever):
John Cleese (famous for throwing a dead parrot)
Bill Corbett (famous for impersonating a robot)
Jonathan Coulton (famous for writing a song about cake)
Felicia Day (famous for being the love interest of evil genius Doogie Howser)
Stephen Fry (not famous for throwing a dead parrot)
John Hodgman (a famous minor television personality)
Paul F. Tompkins (famous for loving many various decades on VH1)
The staff at The A.V. Club (famous for eating cheeseburger in a can)
Barack Obama's PR department (cleverly disguised as Barack Obama)

Oasis Tries Their Hand at Viral Marketing

Last year, Oasis decided to promote their new album, Dig Your Own Soul, in a very unusual way: get buskers from the New York City metro system to learn a couple of the songs, and then "leak" the songs to an unsuspecting public by performing them. Well, that time has come and gone, but they made sure to document the whole experience in this fascinating, 18-minute film (with cinematography by Wendy and Lucy's Sam Levy):


Monday, January 19, 2009

Mad Men Crash The Soup

I never get tired of the left-field surprises The Soup keeps throwing at me:



In related news, LEVAR BURTON?! I haven't seen that dude in, like, forever!!

Friday, January 16, 2009

Keanu Reeves to Continue Decimating My Childhood

After single-handedly destroying The Day the Earth Stood Still, one of my favorite science fiction films of all-time, Keanu Reeves (who last appeared in a decent film in 2006, with Richard Linklater's A Scanner Darkly) has decided to take his mediocrity gun and aim it at my favorite anime series, Cowboy Bebop. From Film News Briefs:

Twentieth Century Fox is bringing the Japanese anime TV series “Cowboy Bebop” to the big screen, with Keanu Reeves attached to star as a bounty hunter traveling through space in 2071. One of the big titles in anime, “Bebop” is set in a time where “astral gates” make interstellar travel possible. Humanity, decimated by a lunar explosion resulting from a gate accident, spread out across the solar system, as did crime, which gave rise to the use of bounty hunters. Reeves would play Spike Spiegel, a bounty hunter and former member of a crime syndicate. Spiegel, along with Jet Black, a fellow bounty hunter and former cop, are the two pilots of the spaceship Bebop. Peter Craig is writing the script.

All we can hope for is a solid supporting cast to compensate for Neo McBland.

Thursday, January 15, 2009

Firewall of Sound - Official Trailer

I was in the lab all this week, cutting together a short trailer for the upcoming feature-length version of my indie music doc Firewall of Sound. I'd prefer you visited the actual YouTube page, so you could watch it in high-quality, but I've embedded it here for your convenience:



So...what does this mean? Well, I am currently applying for a wide variety of grant money, which will go towards equipment and travel expenses for the film. I have ideas about who I would like to interview and where I would like to go, but all of that is dependent on how much money I will be receiving and who agrees to be a subject in the film. I have been immensely grateful to the people who agreed to be interviewed for the short film, and they will most certainly appear in the feature, some of whom I might contact for follow-ups in the near future. Ideally, I would like to use the feature-length to focus on topics I wasn't able to cover in the short, like bloggers who started their own record labels, the recent trend of bands doing impromptu gigs for blogs like La Blogotheque, and what it means to be a "sellout" in an industry where little to no money can be made off of traditional distribution.

As you can surmise, a lot of this is up in the air, and I hope to have more definite answers to your burning questions in the near future. For now, there's a trailer and a placeholder website, which will only exist long enough for me to modify the blog I made for the film back in '06. Until then, keep checking back and I'll keep you posted on updates.

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

R.I.P. McGoohan and Montalban

Two amazing actors died today: Patrick McGoohan, best known as the titular star of the surreal '60s British spy series The Prisoner, and Ricardo Montalban, who played everyone's favorite evil supervillain in Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan. They will both be missed immensely.

Tuesday, January 06, 2009

Hall of Awesome: Best Albums of 2008

Sigur Rós - Með Suð Í Eyrum Við Spilum Endalaust

10

Sigur Rós

Með Suð Í Eyrum Við Spilum Endalaust














Fleet Foxes - Fleet Foxes

9

Fleet Foxes

Fleet Foxes














She & Him - Volume One

8

She & Him

Volume One














Gnarls Barkley - The Odd Couple

7

Gnarls Barkley

The Odd Couple














Girl Talk - Feed the Animals

6

Girl Talk

Feed the Animals














Death Cab for Cutie - Narrow Stairs

5

Death Cab for Cutie

Narrow Stairs














R.E.M. - Accelerate

4

R.E.M.

Accelerate














Spiritualized - Songs in A&E

3

Spiritualized

Songs in A&E














Coldplay - Viva La Vida or Death and All His Friends

2

Coldplay

Viva La Vida or Death and All His Friends














Bon Iver - For Emma, Forever Ago

1

Bon Iver

For Emma, Forever Ago













2008 was a year of rediscovery for me, a time to take in all the music I'd been missing out on for the last few years. I fully absorbed In Rainbows and if I could take back my Best of '07 list, it would be at the top. I took advantage of Amazon.com's daily discounts on MP3s, snatching up The Shins' Oh, Inverted World, Guided By Voices' Bee Thousand, Broken Social Scene's You Forgot It In People, M.I.A.'s Kala and others. Also, to celebrate the election, Ryan Catbird gave away everything his label had released for free, so I'm still taking in the vast quantities of music he's supplied me with (thanks again, man, and let me just say Manishevitz' East to East is fantastic). So, I'm surprised I was able to cobble together ten albums I actually got around to listening to this year, and some of them I didn't even hear for the first time until a few weeks ago. I only recently decided to include Fleet Foxes on my list, even though I had their song "Blue Ridge Mountains" on my 2008 Mixtape, thus breaking one of the few rules I give myself. I really don't feel like getting into the specific reasons why I picked each album, other than to say that I didn't expect new albums by R.E.M. and Spiritualized, two acts I felt had become irrelevant in recent years, to make my list but there you have it. Also, Bon Iver not only wins the best album of the year award, but also the best album to listen to during a drive through a rainstorm in the middle of the night award. Anyway, click on the album titles to stream them, courtesy of La La.

Honorable Mentions:
Ben Folds, Way to Normal
Conor Oberst, Conor Oberst
The Explorers Club, Freedom Wind
Flight of the Conchords, Flight of the Conchords
Jeff Hanson, Madam Owl
Oasis, Dig Out Your Soul
The Raconteurs, Consolers of the Lonely
Someone Still Loves You Boris Yeltsin, Pershing
Neil Patrick Harris, Nathan Fillion, Felicia Day and Others, Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog: The Soundtrack

Friday, December 26, 2008

Hall of (Not So) Awesome: The Worst Films of 2008

I'd like to say I did a fairly good job of weeding out the bad movies beforehand, thanks to sites like The A.V. Club and Rotten Tomatoes. But I still found myself subjected to some truly horrible movies this year, and though I was thankfully spared from dreck like The Happening and Witless Protection (the A.V. Club's top two worst movies of the year), I was still able to find five films unworthy of the celluloid they were printed on...

5. Hancock (dir. Peter Berg)

Let me begin by saying that Hancock itself was not a bad movie. Rather, the second half of Hancock is a bad movie. For the first hour, we are presented with a wildly funny, wholly unpredictable look at a reluctant superhero being molded into something more presentable by a struggling PR man. That PR man is played by Jason Bateman, who needs to be in more movies, the opposite of which can be said about Charlize Theron, who is practically invisible throughout the first half, but sadly dominates all of the second, going so far as pushing star Will Smith out of the spotlight. While more of the blame needs to go to the screenwriters for making Theron spout all this unnecessary back story and superhero mythology, claiming that (SPOILER) she and Smith are immortal alien lovers, even though nothing resembling chemistry occurs between the two actors. Bottom line is Hancock was one or two rewrites away from being a solid superhero movie. Close, but no cigar.

4. Saw V (dir. David Hackl)

I got to hand it to the Saw guys; they keep finding imaginative ways for Tobin Bell to reappear in films, even though he was killed off in the third one. His demise came too early, anyway; he always seems to be the only good actor to appear in these new installments. Saw V certainly didn't do anything to change that theory, with Costas Mandylor taking over Bell's role as the new Jigsaw killer, making Shawnee Smith the 2nd Most Boring Person to Replace Jigsaw (there have only been two). It doesn't help that the killer and the protagonist (Scott Peterson) look a lot alike, and are both equally flat actors. The film does a nice job revisiting the haunted house motif that made Saw II tolerable, but it's simply a case of too little, too late. Just reanimate Bell's corpse already!

3. Mamma Mia! The Movie (dir. Phyllida Lloyd)

Yes, I somehow found myself in a screening of Mamma Mia!, which brought the average age of the audience I was with down about 20 years. It was a clear mistake, too, as a film in which Meryl Streep and Pierce Brosnan walking to the bank to deposit their paycheck for working on this film would've been much more entertaining. They would've retained their dignity, anyway, as Mamma Mia! required most of the cast to flail around like idiots (and not just during the dance numbers), scream incessantly whenever meeting someone, and in the end credits, donning the most misguided costumes ever conceived:


I know I wasn't the target audience for this film, but then again, I wasn't the target audience for Hairspray either and I loved it.

2. Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull (dir. Steven Spielburg)

I almost feel sorry for including this movie on the list; haven't Spielburg and Lucas suffered enough for their crimes?

No, no they haven't. As long as this film contains CGI prairie dogs, nuclear bomb-proof fridges, sword-wielding Russian psychics, a failed attempt at a sidekick franchise, and the award for Worst Use of John Hurt in a Movie, no punishment will be too harsh for this disaster of a film, not even South Park's scathing attack on Lucas and Spielburg in the episode "The China Problem":



1. Deadgirl (dir. Marcel Sarmiento and Gadi Harel)

If I had seen this film during my time as a programmer for Cucalorus, I would've given it a bad mark and that would've been that. But somehow this film went through our screening process unscathed and was given a prime midnight slot at this year's festival. Anticipation was high and everyone was excited about seeing the next word in American horror movies. Well, we're still waiting for the next word, because all we saw were two guys having their way with a female zombie in an abandoned insane asylum. That's the entire movie.

The guys stumble across the titular character, one of them decides to keep her as his sex toy, and mayhem ensues. At no point does the audience sympathize with anybody (except maybe the poor actress playing the dead girl), and directors Sarmiento and Harel keep creativity and originality to a bare minimum as they bombard the screen with all manner of sex and violence, ultimately signifying nothing. Some of the women in the audience were enjoying themselves, apparently finding some misguided sense of empowerment from scenes in which the dead girl gets her revenge on the male protagonists, but by that point, I simply wasn't up to watching the rest of this bloody train wreck, so I ended up leaving the theater, ashamed that the people I worked for and trusted had decided to screen this horrible excuse for a movie.

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Coldplay's Christmas Wish (with Simon Pegg)

Coldplay gave their fans an early Christmas present with a free download of the Thin White Duke remix of "Viva La Vida," as well as this video of the band performing "Jingle Bells" with dueling harmonicas by Chris Martin and special guest Simon Pegg:

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Hall of Awesome: 5 Movies We're Looking Forward To in '09

1. Watchmen (dir. Zack Snyder)
I don't think I need to explain why this is the most hotly anticipated superhero movie since...well, The Dark Knight. The original graphic novel is one of the most fascinating books ever made, pictorial or otherwise, and while I believe that director Zack Snyder is anything but "visionary," I do believe he is good at faithfully adapting comic books, so this one seems like a pretty good fit. Plus, no big name actors to distract us from all the awesome visual effects. I also have to give Snyder credit for keeping his fans in the loop, with his comprehensive video blog and free stuff on iTunes. Release Date: March 6

2. Coraline (dir. Henry Selick)
Henry Selick is the true genius behind Tim Burton's The Nightmare Before Christmas and this time, he's teaming up with fantasy writer Neil Gaiman (Stardust, Mirrormask) for this homemade tale of a young girl whisked into a parallel world where everything is the same...yet completely different. Stop-motion animation always gets me excited, and the filmmakers have been gracious enough to provide fans with a slew of footage and featurettes to whet our appetite. Release Date: February 6

3. Up (dir. Pete Docter/Bob Peterson)
As usual, Pixar has kept a tight lid on their latest creation, only recently debuting a trailer (shown below) and plot summary, which looks like it was pulled out of a Chris Van Allsburg short story. If this is half as good as WALL•E, I'll be impressed. Release Date: May 29

4. 9 (dir. Shane Acker)
Animator Shane Acker created a surreal little short back in 2005 called 9, in which a little human-ish creature (kinda like those felt things in LittleBigPlanet) has to defeat a robot bug thing and save the souls of his lost friends...or something. Anyway, it caught the attention of Tim Burton and Timur Bekmambetov (Wanted, Night Watch) who produced a feature-length version, keeping Shane Acker as the director and hiring an all-star cast (including Elijah Wood, John C. Reilly and Jennifer Connelly) to do voicework. We'll see if the intimate little short film can blossom into a multi-million dollar blockbuster, but if the trailer is any indication, it should be quite interesting to watch. Release Date: September 9

5. Duplicity (dir. Tony Gilroy)
Tony Gilroy took everyone by surprise when he suddenly went from "guy who wrote all the Bourne screenplays" to "guy who wrote and directed the Oscar nominated Michael Clayton." Now, he's back with a slightly more comical look at corporate corruption, as Julia Roberts and Clive Owen play ex-spies who decide to double-cross their respective employers (played by Tom Wilkinson and Paul Giamatti) and collect $20 million. Looks like Ocean's Eleven meets The Bourne Identity, and with Gilroy at the helm, I wouldn't want it any other way. Release Date: March 20